Tuesday

today was a sort of free class.... i researched about Hemingway. I like his Iceberg theory, but i feel that he would have to exercise considerable restraint, stating only what he feels is necessary.

However, i feel that this method is very successful because it appeals to the reader' ego: it allows the reader to form his own interpretation of the story. no wonder he won the Nobel Prize!

i also asked rab for help with my application for a scholarship. He readily agreed...... i wish i had met Rab before i entered ICU, when i was writing my application for the PeaceBell scholarship....how much life would have been better. What made my blood really boil is that one of my friends, i think he is a sadistic person, i told him of my bad fortune with the Peacebell and he says that he happens to have a peacebell scholarship, though he doesn't have any financial problems......f$#k f@$K f#$k

so i really really really need to get this loan. to at least get some peace of mind, and not be darkly muttering to myself whenever my 'friend' is around.

thats the problem with money, its all too easy to get caught up with it. I really admire my parents because they don't allow money to define their lives. They support my wish to be involved in agriculture. Sometimes i wish that my father had stopped me and said, nonsense, you can't go to Japan, we can't afford it,i'll educate you instead...... hah... no use lamenting about things past.

this is what happens when rab doesn't conduct classes... skeletons tumble out of the closet to fill the void.( wry laugh .... creases should form around your mouth)